


Ten Easy Steps To Get A Sugar Mommy, Siren Edition

by satantookmydignity



Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Alternate Universe - The Little Mermaid Fusion, Angst and Humor, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Tragedy, Angst with a Happy Ending, Attempt at Humor, Crack Treated Seriously, Family Drama, Family Issues, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Gender Issues, Lucio (The Arcana) Is A Little Shit, Male Pronouns for Asra (The Arcana), Mommy Issues, Nonbinary Character, Other, POV First Person, POV Original Character, Slow Burn, Swearing, Trust Issues, asra is an asshole, but he tries to help, everyone is stupid, he apologizes tho, he did bad things, i apologize to you asra lovers, only in the end lol, to my oc
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-15
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-12 09:41:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28758255
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/satantookmydignity/pseuds/satantookmydignity
Summary: Have you ever seen those stupid commercials where people screw up the simplest things in the most idiotic way possible? Yeah... This is what happened here... 68 people died trying to find that freaking cursed wand. 68 stories we were told when we were kids. And today... I had to be the one to finally find it. Sounds great, right? You probably don't understand what I'm talking about right now. Let me take you back to the beginning of this story.
Relationships: Apprentice & Morga (The Arcana), Apprentice/Morga (The Arcana), Morga (The Arcana)/Original Character(s)
Kudos: 1





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Heyo folks! As you have probably noticed, English is not my first language, so I apologise for any mistakes I make. Please feel free to correct me! 
> 
> The reason I wrote this is because Morga deserves some appreciation. That's it.

Have you ever seen those stupid commercials where people screw up the simplest things in the most idiotic way possible? Yeah... This is what happened here... 68 people died trying to find that freaking cursed wand. 68 stories we were told when we were kids. And today... I had to be the one to finally find it. Sounds great, right? You probably don't understand what I'm talking about right now. Let me take you back to the beginning of this story.

* * *

It was like any other day. The harmonious ripples of the water brushed my tail as I sat on a rock. The soft hum of my voice echoed in the cave, my home. Shimmering lights reflected off the water, making the ceiling look like the night sky. The gems in the walls colored the room in every color you could imagine. On the little island that stood in the water, the golden jewels, armor, and swords reflected that light, right in my face.

With a sigh I left the rock on which I was sitting and sank into the clear water. Since it was still bright outside, the entrance to the cave let in enough light to see everything underwater. That gorgeous color of blue was something you could not find in the cities anymore. Especially after the plague came. Luckily, I ran away from Vesuvia before it got almost everyone, but the sour memories still made me feel sorry for them.

I got out of the water while shaking my head to make these memories go away. The only thing I didn't want to remember now was my inability to help those poor people who had died because of the plague. My dark blue hair got stuck to my face as I got out. I pulled it back so I could see where to step. As I sat down on the mossy rock, my tail began to disappear and turned into two legs. Getting up was not so easy, though. Every time I transformed back into my human form, I somehow forgot how to walk normally.

While I was trying to step forward on my wobbly legs, I heard the cry of a bird. A bird I knew well enough. I sighed and turned in its direction. A white seagull flew into the cave and landed right in front of me. He turned his head to the side as if waiting for something.

"What do you want?”, I tried to shoo him away. “Go away! Shoo! Abracadabra! What do you listen to, stupid bird?!"

He just looked at me with wide eyes. I sighed, turned away, and walked toward my chair. It had gold armrests and a red pouffe was placed in front of it. With a soft sigh, I sat down. Egghead (or Eggy for short), the seagull, approached and hopped onto the pouffe. He looked exhilarated, even though I had not done anything with him yet. I just shrugged and took a book from my bookshelf. As soon as I opened it, Eggy started screaming at the top of his lungs. I turned to him with an annoyed look and he immediately shut up. With a loud sigh, I began to read the book, only to be interrupted by Eggy again.

"I swear, if you interrupt my reading again, my pillows will be filled with your feathers!" I exclaimed. "Shut ... just shut up ... please ..."

For a moment it looked like he was nodding, but I just shook my head in disbelief. I returned to my book and lost myself again in the tale of a swashbuckling pirate. I have read this book at least a hundred times, but it was too good to let it end with such a tragic epilog. The hero who was supposed to win in the end loses everything and becomes exactly what he hated. The Bad Guy. My favorite part was probably the one where he had to talk to a bunch of mermaids and he realized that not all of them were evil.

“Fish!” cried out Eggy. 

“Go and hunt for yourself…” I mumbled. “I’m not your mother.”

In response, Eggy attacked my legs. I cried out and fell off my chair. Eggy jumped right on top of me and started nipping me with his beak. Getting an angry seagull off me was not the easiest task in the world, but I was already used to it, so I just laughed. Sometimes I loathed that silly bird, but in my darkest and loneliest moments, he was always there for me, so I owed him a lot.

“Fine… fine…” I chuckled. “What do you want to eat, asshole?”

“Fish! Cheese!” he commanded.

“Where the hell should I get cheese from?!” I hissed. “You don’t want me to go to the nearest village, do you…?"

He just looked at me with wide eyes, and I knew right away that is what he wanted. I sighed and got up from the floor. After stretching a bit, I grabbed a purse full of gold coins and tied it around my waist. Using a piece of fabric, I tied my hair up so it would not be in the way when I got out of the water. After staring at the exit for a few seconds, I quickly jumped into the water, my tail growing out almost immediately.

I glanced at the surface, only to see Eggy flying above me. With a sly smile, I continued on my way toward the lake in front of my cave. The winding tunnels would have confused many people, but I knew them as well as the small lines on my own palms. The oasis blue water was transparent enough to see the sharp edges of the rocks, so I had less trouble getting out. As I passed the tiny waterfall in front of my cave, I finally found myself outside. 

With my hair tied up, it was much easier to get to the surface, because I could finally see the outside world. The dark pines cast their shadows on me like protective giants. In the distance I could make out the Southern Spines' snow-capped mountains peering out at me like the world turtle. I got out of the lake and landed on the fresh snow. It was freezing outside, but if I had to buy food, there was nothing I could do. The worst part was that the nearest village that sold some cheese was about 40 miles from me, so I had to walk a lot to get there. Eggy landed on my shoulder and waited to begin our journey.

“One day, you will be my dinner…” I mumbled.

In reply he pinched my neck and it did indeed hurt a lot. I made my way to my secret stash of warmer clothes. I never really took furs to my cave because I had to take them with me when I swam, so I built a hidden igloo instead. It was not that far away and I found it easily. I pushed away the branches that lay upon it, so that I could enter the igloo. Inside I found some cloaks and furs, which I immediately wrapped around me. The warmth of those soft furs permeated my entire body. With a soft sigh, I left the igloo and was now ready to go and find some cheese.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed it! Comments are always appreciated, but never necessary!


	2. I’m Not a Failure, I’m Just a Happy Little Accident

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After hours of looking at pictures of seagulls, I decided that I want one. Anyway, enjoy the chapter!

It was snowing heavily as I moved forward. Eggy was just wrapped in furs and I carried him in my arms. When I left my cave, I never expected to be caught in such a storm. I could barely walk because the wind kept pushing me back. Turning back was out of the question since I was already about halfway there. I had no intention of stopping now. Eggy snuggled closer to my chest and I could feel the coldness of his beak. With one of my hands, I stroked his head.

"It's okay, buddy ..." I shouted loud enough to drown out the roar of the storm. "We are halfway through!" 

He snuggled even closer to me and buried his head completely under the furs. I was about to add something to my previous statement when I heard the howl of a wolf in the distance. Even though the storm was basically howling, I could hear it clearly, which could only mean one thing. This wolf was close to us. And if there was one near us, there probably had to be more of them. The sound came from behind us, so I started walking faster.

At this point, I had no idea where we were. I was more focused on getting away from the wolf than paying attention to where I was actually going. Luckily, I found a cave, so I quickly waddled inside. When we finally got a break from all the snow, I sighed. Eggy jumped out of my arms and landed on the ground with a small squeak. I put down some furs Eggy was wrapped in so he could lay down and not freeze to death.

"Cold ..." he shivered. 

"I know ... I know ..." I sighed. "We cannot leave until this subsides ... You will be okay, right?"

It looked like he was nodding, so I sat down right next to him. As soon as I was on the floor, he brushed his face against my leg. With a grin, I stroked his feathers a little to get him to calm down. I pressed my back against the wall and waited for the storm to end. The wolf's howl did not go away, but at least he was not so close to us anymore. In those moments, I wondered why I had moved south. It was always cold here and the area was not any better. The only place to buy food was a small village near the Salty Sea.

The village was also quite poor. Mainly because they were often robbed by pirates and not many sailors visited the place. Whenever I went there, they always tried to sell me everything they had. It was devastating to look at their sad faces. And even though I was welcome there, I never really made friends with anyone. The reason was that the village hated the Merfolks. I heard them talk countless times about how they wanted to kill us all so they could get more money. Our tails and scales cost more than a house in most towns. That's why they all wanted to kill us. And that's why I didn't trust anyone.

With a sigh, I pulled my legs closer to my chest to keep the heat from escaping so quickly. My whole body shivered as another blast of cold air bit into my face. Eggy moved closer to me, trying to get warm. It was quite shocking how in my cave the temperature was comfortably warm, yet this environment was deadly cold. This storm, however, was far more frigid than any I had ever experienced. And that was quite a lot indeed. I have lived here for about 4 years now and this one was the worst I have experienced yet. It almost felt like your limbs were going to shatter to pieces at any moment.

“Water?” Eggy poked my legs. 

"Don't worry about it, buddy ..." I shook my head. "I only have to spend about 6 hours a day in the water. If the storm dies down quickly, then we can reach the cave in no time. I'll be fine. But are you all right? If I'd known there was going to be a storm, I would have left you at home."

“Fine…” he nodded.

I stroked his head as he sat down in my lap. His beak was very cold, so I tried to warm him up a little. I wrapped the furs around us and Eggy moved to the most covered spot. Sitting here anxiously waiting for the storm to end was really exhausting. Especially because Eggy was here. If I left him at home, I wouldn't have to worry about him dying in the cold. That was the last thing I wanted to happen. Even though I joke about killing him, I never mean it. And he knows that. We just like to tease each other.

This reminded me of one of my old friendships. It was with two boys. One was named Asra and the other Muriel. I found them soon after I became an orphan and we became really good friends. Asra and I liked to tease each other, while Muriel was the quiet one in the group. We often got into trouble for cheating in card games but luckily Muriel got really good at it over time. However, after the Count got them to work for him, our friendship fell apart. Muriel became a gladiator and Asra became a magician. And I just... just tried to survive there.

With a groan, I tried to forget those memories. So much happened after we grew up. Things I do not want to remember, but cannot forget. Especially after what Asra did. That's why I ran away. To that cold place where he could not find me. The last thing I wanted to do was talk to him. For all I knew, the Count died because of him, too. Even if nobody liked him, that was a bit much. But not for him, I guess.

"You sad...." Eggy whispered. 

"Kinda..." I snorted. "But I'm more angry."

"Why?" he asked. 

"I remembered a friendship I had with a boy." I shrugged. 

"Love?" he peered from under the fur. 

"I used to love him, but now ... I just ... hate him." I sighed. "That's what you get for telling someone you are a merfolk... He's a piece of shit... If I ever see his fucking face again... I... I don't know... I cannot do anything... He could just... Skedaddle skidoodle me with his magic or something." 

"Weak." he chirped. 

"Oh, so what if I am?!" I roared. "Like you're that much stronger, stupid bird! I could easily beat you at anything!"

"Fly ..." he snickered.

For a moment I just stared at him with an expressionless face. I was about to throw him out of my lap when I heard a strange noise from outside. It was loud and very much resembled thunder, but somehow it was different. I quickly glanced toward the entrance, only to see the white of the storm. Eggy snuggled closer to me and began to shiver.

“What the freaking heck was that…” I whispered. 

“Scary…” Eggy nodded. 

"I swear, this is the weirdest day I have ever had in my life ..." I snorted. "What is going to happen next? Is a big dragon going to appear out of nowhere and try to kill me?! Oh ... I hope I didn't jinx it ..."

With a loud gulp, I pushed Eggy out of the way and stood up. I took the smallest steps I could, hoping I would not make too much noise. Eggy quickly snuggled up to my leg and tried to hide behind me. Unfortunately, I had no idea how to fight and I did not have any weapons with me. If someone or something was just coming to kill me, there was nothing I could do. My hands were shaking as I approached the entrance. Then another strange noise was heard. This time it was much closer.

I picked Eggy up in a flash, with all the furs, and ran outside, in the opposite direction of the sound. The storm was so big I couldn't even see where I was going. All I knew was that I had to run or I would be the lunch of something. Eggy said something to me, but the wind was too loud and I couldn't hear it. The snow under my feet stuck to my shoes like it was glue. It was getting harder and harder to run and soon I could barely walk. My hands and legs felt like popsicles about to be crushed.

And when I was about to fall into the snow, because I could no longer move, everything became still. The storm disappeared as if by chance. With a frown, I turned around and tried to find the source of this strange phenomenon. But there was nothing to be seen. The temperature increased and I could finally hear normally again. Eggy peeked out from the furs and then turned his head toward me. He looked like a clueless child trying to understand what his parents were telling him.

“I-.... I don’t understand.” I shook my head. “The storm… It was… It was right here! It can’t just disappear! Did we… Did we die? What happened?! What the fuck is going on?!”

I was waiting for someone to appear. Anyone. A magician, an animal, literally anything, but the only person who was here was none other than me. I shook my head, not understanding how this could happen. With a gulp, I turned my head towards the trees, trying to find some moss so I could see which way to go. When I found out where north was, I immediately left the place we were at. 

My legs moved as fast as they could. Even though I was still frozen because of the storm, I didn't waste a single second staying there. Eggy did not speak either. He was probably just as surprised as I was. You don't see a deadly storm disappearing in no time, am I right? Of course we were surprised. My heart almost leapt out of my chest, but I paid no attention to it, for I had to get to the village as quickly as possible. 

I absolutely regretted the decision to come out of my cave and get Eggy some cheese. Eating fish would have been enough for him. But of course not, I had to come here and find the only village near me that sold cheese. Sometimes I wondered why I did so many things for that stupid bird. At that moment, he snuggled closer to me, trying to capture some of my warmth. His beak was pressed against my shoulder as he peered behind me. When he saw nothing of interest, he turned his head back. I stroked his feathers a little to help him relax. 

That's when I finally saw the outline of the village in the distance. A smile fought its way onto my face and I began to walk at a faster pace. Hoping that these people had not seen the storm, I stepped into the village. It looked like everyone was going about their daily lives, not caring about anything. Pigs were playing in the slushy snow, chickens were eating seeds off the ground, cows were standing in their places, and goats were running all over the village.

I chuckled a little as I went on. The place where I usually bought cheese was at the port. An old woman always welcomed me there and even gave me some extra food if she was in the mood. Like every time, I stepped into her little cottage, that looked like a shop. She came immediately and greeted me with a warm smile. Her silver braids were a little messy, but considering her age, she was still in good shape. The dress she wore was made out of brown leather and white fur, though it looked dirtier than usual. 

"Bazil, hun!" she beckoned me to come nearer. "How have you been? I haven't seen you in weeks! I thought something might have happened to you!"

With a giggle, I added, "Don't worry, I just didn't have time to come." After that statement, Eggy immediately bit my hand. "Ouch, you stupid bird!" 

"Ah, I see you brought this gentleman with you as well." She stepped closer to me and began petting Eggy's head. "How are you, handsome young man?"

If he was a cat, he would've been purring by now. I could see all over his face how much pleasure this gave him. After rolling my eyes at this, I cleared my throat so that Isolda, the woman, would turn her attention to me. 

"As you can probably guess, someone wanted some cheese, so here I am!" I chortled. "Do you have any?"

"Of course, of course!" she smiled and walked behind the counter. "Would you like goat or cow's milk cheese?"

She picked out two blocks of cheese and I sat Eggy down on the table so he could choose. He eyed the pieces for a minute, then walked over to the goat cheese and started chirping. Isolda smiled and put the cow cheese away. I took out my little leather purse and gave her all the gold that was in it. She thanked me and put that away too. I quickly wrapped the cheese and tied it around my waist. Eggy climbed onto my shoulder and looked down on us like a king.

"He's so adorable," she giggled. "It's strange how he will not let you go. Most seagulls would just go to someone else after a few days ..."

"I'd be happy if he just flew away, honestly ..." I sighed. "My life would be so much calmer..."

"And probably boring." She shook her head. "I think you complete each other. You said you live alone, right? He helps you not die of boredom!"

"I-... Eh, you have a point there." I shrugged. "But he's still annoying." 

"Haha, I never said he was not," she smiled. 

"Anyway, did you see the storm?" I asked. 

"Oh?" she looked surprised. "What storm? I don't think anyone saw it from here ... Others would've told me 'bout it."

"Well, it was pretty big, so I'm shocked you didn't see it." I shrugged. "I almost froze to death on the way here..."

"Oh, that is awful!" she gasped. "Are you sure you have to go back that fast? If it was really that bad... You could stay here in the village for a while." 

"I really need to go back." I sighed. "If not soon, then I'll have to travel at night. And we both know the forest is dangerous at night." 

"Alright." she nodded. "Take care of yourself and try to arrive safely. I hope you come back soon." 

"I'll try." I laughed. "Have a good day." 

"You too!" she waved as I stepped outside.

My happiness came back at last. I could see that Eggy was doing much better now. That meant we could finally go home and forget everything that had happened today. With a happy sigh, I walked through a herd of goats, trying not to touch any of them. I knew those bad boys could attack you at the slightest touch, so I was not taking any chances. Walking out of the village was easier than most of the times I tried. Usually someone was trying to sell me something, but now everyone was minding their own business.

They looked like wolves, but I knew they weren't. Their fangs pierced through their skin, leaving trails of blood running down their faces. I could see in their eyes that there was no life left in them. Their bodies were at least twice the size of a normal wolf and their fur was barely hanging on. Small pieces of their bones poked through their skin and fur, making them look like zombies. The only thought going through my mind at that moment was, how am I going to survive this?


End file.
